Sunday, August 15, 2010

Satan-Sent Familiar

While visiting your MIL you were requested to lock yourself in the upstairs bedroom while breastfeeding the baby (because heaven forbid your ADULT fucking FIL or ADULT fucking BIL, who doesn’t even live there anymore, might catch a partial passing glance of your filthy white breast!). Somehow the cat-who-refuses-human-contact inadvertently got locked in the bedroom with you, and as the sated babe turned her head from your breast, you were accosted by the feline who immediately went for your milk-moistened nipple. With visions of Satan-sent familiars dancing through your head, you quickly tossed the poor thing off before he could get a taste.

The in-laws did NOT find this story funny.

P.S.— It’s your own damn fault that you let them cow you into hiding while you nurse. Growing a fucking spine already.

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